Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Touch me not

A child and pregnancy take a lot out of a marriage: time, energy and attention, for starters. And I know when the kids get older, when they join sports or other activities and make friends of their own, they demand even more time, energy and attention. Eventually, between jobs and carpooling and household chores, the person we end up having the least amount of time for is our spouse.

Most days now, I am lucky to have enough energy to give my husband a kiss goodnight. That romp between the sheets that he is begging for is out of the question. I told him that when I'm not so tired, or maybe sometime over the weekend would be good. He rolls over, frustrated, and I stare into the darkness, exhausted and wondering if I'll ever be in the mood again. Oftentimes, when sex does happen, it feels more like a chore than an act of pleasure.

It says that a sexless marriage, even if its is temporary, can cause a sense of disconnectedness between a wife and husband. I know it is important part of the glue that keeps parents or married couples connected.

I hope this is just happening now because I'm pregnant and caring for a toddler, maybe things will change later on say after giving birth? that's 5 more months to go! Can my husband wait that long?? Hopefully...


Mom of Four said...

HI Momnificent..I am sorry to hear that you are always tired due to your pregnancy and caring for a toddler. If you are already exhausted now, I can't imagine how much exhaustion you're going to get when the baby comes. The less time you're going to spend with your hubby, the big possibility of hmmm..miscommunication. I hope things will get better before it gets worse..

Take care..

MOMnificent said...

Yes Liza I know I have to do something or I'll regret later on, but cant they just understand? :(

Mom of Four said...

Mommy, of course they do understand, but you can't always say that your hubby can just wait until you are up for it. He needs your time too, I always set aside things when my hubby needed me. Even if I was tired, I make sure that he's happy and with a smile on his face when going to bed. Most of the time, he understands, and few times he doesn't want to understand. You know what I mean?

Elizabeth said...

Hi Momnificent,
yes, liz is kinda right. I learned from the marriage seminars I've attended that men's first need is sexual (in nature), not like us women whose first need is affection.
So when I knew about it, I prepared myself, mentally and physically, to giving in to his desires, hehehe, (sorry for the word), even though I am sooo tired. The important for me is I'm the one he is desiring about, not other women, right?

nicoleyy said...

ohh.i hope soo :) tell him it wud be worth the wait.hehe :) bloghoppin.come and visit me too. teehe!